'Tis the Season....

.... to be pissed off at relatives.

I mean, it is, right?

When we moved in August, my dad took one look at our attic and told me: throw everything away.

The stuff that filled our attic? Was mostly tons of shipping boxes and lots of clothing boxes from Christmases and birthdays gone by.

I argued with him: we're going to NEED those boxes. Christmas isn't that far away, and what are we going to do then?

But he was a stubborn ass insistent so I dropped it and recycled all the boxes.

So I get up at 6 this morning and realize the gifts are beginning to pile up. So I gather the wrapping supplies (that in itself was quite the task..)... and then I realize.

We have zero boxes to put clothes in and zero boxes to ship these gifts to the 4 corners of the US.

So please excuse my moodiness.

'Tis the season.

All I Want for Christmas is...

I have no clue.

I am literally the worst person to buy gifts for. WORST. Honestly, I think The Boy could reason that the best side-effect of dumping me is the fact that he didn't have to buy me Christmas or birthday presents.

Let's start with the fact that I can't make a list of things I want. I suck at it. Occasionally I can come up with a couple of things, but usually the gift-givers complain that my wisher are too utilitarian or boring... so I am a horrible "wisher."

Next up, I am OCD about shopping. We all know I'm a shopaholic - and I hate - HATE HATE when someone pays too much for a gift. For example, one year The Boy got me a robe from Victoria's Secret. LOVED the robe, it was perfect... blah blah. Then I come to find out he paid $100 for it. One hundred dollars. I swear the look on my face was probably the same look the incredible hulk gets. Because the shopaholic in me KNEW that in a month at the Semi-Annual sale he could have got the same robe for $40. And, big mouth that I am, I freak out about money and can't resist telling him how to purchase a robe correctly. In other words, I'm a prize bitch, y'all!

And last but not least, I hate surprises. The Boy once made me a gift. Something totally impractical and not at all suited to my current lot in life. It took him hours and hours - you could tell that from seeing it right away. And yet. It was so impractical. It was basically a piece of home decor that I had zero space or location for. And I kinda freaked - I mean, what was I supposed to do with this "work of art?"

So yeah, I am horrible at presents. In the words of Santa, I have defintely been naughty and probably don't deserve anything at all this year.

Oh wait, it was my dad who said that.

So, said father is starting to freak because my Christmas list is empty. Especially knowing he doesn't like to shop online and the fact that most of the stores I want stuff from are not in Smalltown, Indiana..... I'm stuck.

So far he is getting me:

Two pairs of Victoria's Secret Yoga Leggings, which I ordered last night. Although the gray pair is back-ordered so there will only be 1 pair by Christmas. Is it weird that my dad is giving me the gift of "non pants" - yes.

He is also getting me the Shawl Collar Skinny Cardigan from American Eagle. I ordered it in 2 sizes and then I ordered 2 sizes for my cousin's Christmas gift. I still haven't tried them on even though all 4 sweaters have been sitting on my bedroom floor since Tuesday... and I really wish I'd bought the lighter gray color. Damn!

And last but not least, he has decided to repossess the coat I bought way back when and regift it to me for Christmas. Since I haven't worn it yet I guess it counts, right? And hey, at least I'll have some money in my bank account again. Yay for that! (Coat by Old Navy)

These 3 items together I paid less than $100 for. (See, I KNOW how to shop. The price of them all right now is way more than that.... gosh, I'm such a good shopper. PAT ON THE BACK.)

Ok, anyways. On Christmas day my brother will have some random-ass video game to play and I will be sitting and staring at my pile of clothes bored out of my mind.

I want an iPod touch but my dad refuses, saying that it would just encourage my Twitter obsession and blog reading. So yeah, not going to happen.

Plus, he just got me this lil guy last year:

See, I even have gift-receiving remorse from last year. If I had held out on an iPod last Christmas I totally could've gotten the iPod touch this year. Boo.

Ok, so I just wrote a LOT of pointless crap to say this:

What's on your Christmas list? I need suggestions!

This is my list:

• Books. (If you think my dad is going to randomly pick a book for me, you're insane.... what books are on your wishlist? I've got nothing!)
• iTunes Gift Card (wow, this is a lame, generic request.)
• Target Gift Card (because I like to waste time and money at Target, duh!)

And I think that's it. That's IT. Seriously, I am supposed to be materialistic and a shopaholic... but that's all I've got.

So.

If you love me, tell me what's on your Christmas list this year. Even if you don't think I'd add it to mine - I still want to know.

And also - have you been naughty or nice this year?