Tuesday, July 10, 2012

In Case You Thought My Life Was Normal....

Yesterday was like any other Monday... I worked the late shift.  My boss texted me around 10 am and asked if I would pick up the deposit slips at the bank.  No sweat!

I was running early, so I decided to grab the slips and make the most of my extra time to finish up some work stuff.

Sprinted into the bank, grabbed the slips, and was exiting the bank to the car when I heard it.  A weird.... "shhhhhhhhh shhhhh" noise.  "Shh" is probably not the right spelling of this sound, but I'm trying to be quick here.

It was the sound of liquid hitting asphalt in the parking lot.  So, let me paint the scene for you.

I am leaving the bank via the bottom left of the picture, heading to my car as indicated on the red line.

There is a man (green dot) standing next to his Jeep in the spot next to mine.  Facing away from me.

It is from him that this liquid is coming from.  A steady stream of YELLOW LIQUID COMING FROM HIS PANTS.

At high noon, directly in front of the main window of the bank, a man was PEEING IN THE PARKING LOT.

He was also wearing a sweater in 86 degree temps, but I found that much less startling.

I panicked.  My first thought was to call the police... but literally, what was I going to say?!

"Hello, 911 Emergency?  Hi, this is Sarah.  I'm standing at the bank and this guy here is PEEING.  Just out in the open, WITH HIS PENIS.  I thought you might want to know.  Ok thanks!"

So, I got myself under control.  I wanted him to STOP and STOP NOW so I made some noise, dropped my keys, picked them up.


So, I did what any super girl would do... ran and jumped into my car so fast I hurt my arm.  Put that car into reverse so fast I got whip lash and shut my eyes until I was halfway to the parking lot exit.

The question is... the ladies at the bank think I am awesome (in my mind).  Do I tell them what happened in their parking lot yesterday... or just let that stone go unturned?

Cause honestly, this is the stuff that awesome stories are made of, right?

11 Classy Comments:

byhillary said...

no joke they could be arrested for indecent exposure and be registered as a sex offender if you had called. Which is outrageous and scary.

Also WHY PEE IN THE PARKING LOT? did he look like it was his car at least?

Classy Fab Sarah said...


It was his car, or at least there were no other cars. I forgot to mention the part where he walked and strolled into the bank like nothing was even wrong. Just off to do his business - except apparently the business was already done.

Sarah said...

Yet another reason that money is FREAKING NASTY. Jeeves just whipped out his deal & peed, DIDN'T WASH HIS HANDS, and went in to use someone's pen and grab a few 20's. EW.

As for telling the bank ladies... DO IT! I used to work at a bank and the stories were seriously the best part of the job. Also, they may like the heads up next time he comes in. (Like possibly make the new girl do his banking.)

Ana Osborn said...

Not uncommon. Have seen more of my fair share of people peeing. In public. In broad daylight. AND WHILE GETTING OUT OF A CAB TO WALK INTO A BAR. Yes. It has happened. Welcome to the club.

the girl in the red shoes said...

Oh my word....this would only happen to you! Too funny for words! I would have done the exact same thing!

Meg @ write meg! said...

That is... incredibly weird and bizarre. I can't say I've ever witnessed public peeing, but I probably would have reacted just as you did: by running away! I'd say just try to block that awful image from your mind and don't sweat it.

Sarah said...

Tell them!!!

I was sitting in the car outside an Applebee's one afternoon, and homeboy in the car right across from me (our cars were facing each other) opened his car door and whipped it out and started going right there. Thanks dude.

Andie said...

I would definitely tell them. SO GROSS! Like Sarah said- didn't even wash his hands, etc. eeew.

that is just so inappropriate on so many levels and I'm sure it happens more often than we would like to think.

Deals, Steals and Heels said...

first off..I LOVE THAT YOU MADE AN MS PAINT DRAWING!! sometimes...you just have to. i've done it =)

and EWW. just eww.

Mrs. Jones said...

I would definitely tell the bank - and LOVE your drawing!!!!

katie lake said...

You may not believe this but THIS TOTALLY HAPPENED TO ME TOO! I was at work and looked up to see a man standing outside the door peeing on his van. There was a bunch of old rednecks sitting in a van drinking while waiting to pick someone up from the bus station. I called the cops. They came to talk to the man, made him pour out all his alcohol, and gave him a sobriety test. Oh and my coworker took a picture of him peeing for "evidence".

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