Thursday, October 22, 2009

How Cheeky

I know I was supposed to write about fall and fashion today... but let's save that for next week, shall we?

Ok then.

Seriously, today I have a little rant for Victoria's Secret.

Dear Angels (if I can call you that),

I try to enjoy your company. After all, you employ one of my favorite people in the whole world (Heidi Klum). You continually come up with fun patterns and products, so I try to see the good.

However, we've got to talk.

I recently walked into one of your stores looking for underwear. I'm a little ashamed to admit it, but I was looking for basic, boring cotton underwear for working out.

So I, being the experienced shopper I am, head for the stuff I want. You of course have some salesgirl trailing after me trying to explain the concept of a 5/$25 sale. I say thank you and other nice things but I can't shake this kid. No worries, she can trail along behind me.

Can you predict what happens next? They don't have 5 pairs of anything I remotely want in my size..... hmm, what to do?

So I tell the sales associate sorry but your store just doesn't have what I'm looking for.

Not wanting to lose a sale, she points me towards the PINK section. I explain that the Ultra Super Duper Low rise doesn't really work for my long torso-ed self, but she is waxing on about them.

And then she tries to tell me how awesome cheekies are. How comfortable, how awesome.

And my friends? Cheek-y underwear. Are not awesome. Especially when they come in 3 versions: cheeky, very cheeky, and ultra cheek-a-riffic.

The purpose of the cheeky, I believe, is to look like brief/hipster/boyshort type underwear while allowing your butt to hang out the bottom of them.

But, in my opinion, you know what they are? Thongs, with about 4 inches of extra fabric in the back.

Perfect for getting wedged up your @ss.

Which is exactly what I told the salesgirl as she stared at me with I think a mixture of fear and probably more fear.

So Victoria's Secret? Let's pretend like this whole "cheeky" thing never happened. K?

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P.S. Are there cheeky underwear lovers out there? Am I missing something? Cause I'm not all that upset to be missing giant wedgies but if there is some other benefit... let me hear it!

28 Classy Comments:

Miss Kriss said...

Oh girlie, I feel the exact same way about the cheekys! Seriously, the most giant and uncomfortable wedgie of my entire life. No kidding.

And by the way, while we are on the subject, I cannot stand the annoying sales people!! Especially when I'm buying underwear. I don't know what it is, but they make me feel so self conscious! And I don't know about your VS store, but at mine, the sales ladies are dead set on following me into the dressing room and measuring me. Umm, I'm 26. This ain't my first rodeo. I know what size bra I wear, thankyouverymuch. :)

Whitney said...

I actually looooove cheekies! :) Mainly I wear them to bed with a t-shirt... but I often find myself wearing them with a dress or a skirt too! They cover more of my bottom then a thong and they are cute incase you happen to "flash" someone (yet to happen but I always fear when I wear a dress out) they are the cute underwear to have one if you don't want to show your bottom and you don't want to be embarressed by granny panties!

Kimi said...

Cutesy little undies are for one thing and one thing only and it's not comfort! That's for sure.

Sole Matters said...

i LOVE these....


http://www2.victoriassecret.com/commerce/onlineProductDisplay.vs?namespace=productDisplay&origin=onlineProductDisplay.jsp&event=display&prnbr=EF-231720&page=1&cgname=OSPNKPTSZZZ&rfnbr=3460&atp=a


i wear them 24/7, plus they dont squeeze your fat rolls.

PinkSass said...

I am actually a huge fan of cheekies. LOVE them! Some of the most comfortable yet cute undies.

Classy in Philadelphia said...

I haven't been to VS lately, but I really hate when the salespeople trail me which happens THERE more than anywhere else. I like being helped, but I can find my own underwear thanks.

The Shabby Princess said...

I only like the lace cheekies because I feel like they are a little more stable?? But, for working out, I'm much more of a hipster/boy shorts kinda gal--I need something that will NOT move while I run.

Aly said...

I loveee cheekies, especially the ones with the lace. I think they are so comfortable! Try them you might like em!

Mel said...

Cheeky underpants and I haven't gotten along since day one. I own two pairs that I bought from VS on accident. Wedgy city.

I can proudly say I am anti-cheeky!

Megan said...

I have never tried the cheekies, but they definitely don't sound comfortable.

Confessions Of A Domestic Goddess said...

First off, you're hilarious! Secondly, about the cheekies, I like them, but not when I'm working out. When I'm working out, I wear granny panties. I think the cheekies are nice because they don't ride up like a thong does, but they're definitely not 'movin' and groovin'.

xoxo!

LawGirl said...

I hate cheeky underwear too. They are the most uncomfortable thing. I'll take a thong over them any day!

brown eyed girl said...

I looked at the cheekies and they don't look that comfy. I got their regular cotton undies at 5/25 last week!

Becky said...

I get my undies at VS too and I just get the cotton bikini cuts and I love them! No cheeky showing here, I like my cheeks fully covered! LOL!

etta said...

My husband wishes I'd shop there. I've been wearing boring underwear the last six months since I was working in the garden center. I don't even know if we have a VS.

Why the heck would you want to wear cheekies?

Tiffany said...

Just found your blog and I'm cracking up! Can I just say, Amen! I'm a boring old cotton girl myself and I have found that I love GAP body panties. Best of luck!

Melissa said...

OMG I totally agree- but mostly about the plight about how Victoria Secret NEVER seems to have my size in, particularly in bras. I must wear a really common size but COME ON ORDER MORE IN. Plus their sales associates are really high pressure- do you think they work on commission?

Kristen said...

Ugh, I hate the cheekies. Sooo uncomfortable. I usually tell them my bra size, which can only be found in specialty store, and that shuts them up really quickly.

Denim and Pearls said...

I love boy shorts, hipsters, and some cheekies - they work well with tighter pants.

Blackeyed_Susan said...

Never tried the cheekys but god are the sales associates annoying! I wonder if I'm just old fashioned but I would rather shop for my undies alone!!

Naturally Caffeinated Family said...

i've never tried them either and from your (hilarious) letter, I think my bootay and I will steer clear=)!

Wearing Mascara said...

Hahaha I'm laughing at what you said... Dear angels (if I can call you that). You crack me up :-)

In this wonderful life... said...

This is SO TRUE & SO familiar!!! Annoying! They need to do more surveys....on people like us!

E said...

i'm so glad you posted this, because i thought i was the only one out there who wore basic underwear when working out! i don't know how some girls at the gym do it with the hair, make up and hot underwear- i look like a hot mess (literally) and all i want is to get through my workout-- not worry about where my underwear is headed! i like cheekies- but i agree with the poster above who noted they are for one thing only and it's not comfort! :) hope you find what you're looking for elsewhere!

This Minneapolis Life said...

You are spot on about the cheeky underwear. They are the most uncomfortable ever! What a funny post, loved it.

Melissa said...

SUCH a wedgie- I totally agree. I feel like they're trying to turn into what used to be their "comfort" section into another "sexy" section. Wedgies aren't sexy, the end.
Also, JUST found your blog- happy I did :)

Lulu Bee said...

I thought I was the only one who hated that kind of underwear! It's only good for a massive wedgie!

LAVA said...

I actually just started wearing the cheekies from VS and I love them. I wear a medium and they stay on my bottom but do not give me a wedgie. Actually they stay put better than some of the bikini and other full coverage panties I worn so I have decided they will be my full time underwear.

I hate thongs and only wear them when I absolutely HAVE to...I love full coverage bottoms but these lace cheekies are VERY comfy to me and they stay put. They are great for everyday wear, sleeping...even period days and while I was not wild about some of the colors I did get the 5 for $26 deal and will just wear the ugly ones to sleep.

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