I Conquered the Beast

Remember my ant invasion?

What I may or may not have remembered to post is that there were ants crawling on my dresser. Under my dishwasher. In my back porch. Out my front door.

And on and on and on.

And friends, have I got a product for you!
Terro Liquid Ant Killer.

It's been maybe 4 days (probably less but omg it feels like forever) and the ants are gone. There are maybe like half a dozen left in my house, and they are doing a drunken walk of shame from eating poison.

And the best part? This ant killer stuff is very safe. Made out of borax. Easy peasy.

But the best part is that I'm ant free just a couple of days later. Bliss!

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In unrelated news, this Monday through Friday I am test-driving my new job for a few days... which means I have no long commute!

No more sitting behind this bad boy being pissed off!

Thankfully, I can use all my extra free time to get excited about seeing Eclipse at midnight TOMORROW. Zomg so soon!

Time to break out my awesome homemade t-shirts!

Who's excited for Eclipse??

Still Alive. Send Wine.

I haven't even started replying to all the sweet comments you left on my post earlier this week... but THANK YOU. You are all so sweet.

Group HUG! xxo

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Y'all, moving sucks. The end.

Wow, that was the shortest post ever.

Kidding, you know I can't be stopped at 10 words.

I moved.

Within 24 hours of moving, the following happened:

• Hot Water Heater, Died.
• Fridge, Died.
• Ant Invasion.

And just to clarify, yes, it's a REAL ant invasion. In multiple rooms. Including the kitchen, bathroom, MY bedroom, the entryway, etc.

You just threw up in your mouth, right?

Or maybe just threw up period?

Yeah, I rest my case.

So while I've been internet MIA... I've been ant-fighting. With many poisons.

Meanwhile, this week's wine is brought to you by my former tacky residence.

Isn't that the loveliest ugliest astro-turf covered back porch you've ever seen?

Good riddance!

If you don't hear from me again soon... I was eaten alive by ants. Barf!

Happy Weekend!

Aftermath: 1 Year Later

A year ago today, my life became sectioned into two parts. Before and After.

Before... I was half of a whole. I was on a team. Somebody had my back.

After... I was am confused. I feel very much alone. If I needed someone in the middle of the night, I don't think I would feel comfortable calling anyone.

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This past year, the year following the big break up from my main squeeze of six-ish years, has been one of the longest of my life.

Everything I thought I knew, before, isn't.

I literally feel like my world has turned, for better or worse, upside down.

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The day before the breakup, we attended the wedding of one of my very best friends.

It was a perfect wedding. Beautiful ceremony, awesome reception. Just a perfect day.

I caught the bouquet. My 2nd in a six month period.

(Obviously posing for a different photo when this one was taken. But you can see my awesome hair. I was channeling Audrey Hepburn.)

That day, as I caught the bouquet, I was sure it held so much promise.

Of a future together. Of a long life and much happiness.

Or of an excellent friend of a bride who was sending a hint to her friend's boyfriend to get this show on the road already.

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A year ago, I lived my life day to day, hoping against hope that he would finally get me. Or that he would wake up one morning "ready."

Ready never came.

Today, I'm not wishing on flowers, dead or real.

It's true I'm not living my perfect life - not by a long shot.

But I'm still here, and I'm still smiling.

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I don't know what life has in store for me.

I worry if my health will hold up well enough to have kids.

I worry that I will never be able to let my guard down enough to love again.

So much uncertainty. So little time.

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But I survived.

Without my mom to tell me I was the prettiest and smartest and most awesome-est girl in the world and that any boy would be lucky to have my.

Without any of my college friends nearby.

Without wanting to tell anyone what had happened and wishing that the world would just swallow me up whole.

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If you are reading this (discombobulated, rambling tale) and you are me, one year ago... you'll survive.

And in the aftermath, you will find a woman inside of you that you never knew existed.

One with a hell of a lot more strength than you ever thought you had.

Life's not perfect, and I still haven't found my happy ending.

I have no reason to believe that things are going to work out perfectly. In fact, I have evidence to the contrary.

But at the end of the day, I believe.

Tomorrow is another day....
and you never know what may be just around the corner.

Still Kicking Myself

So I hung out with my BFF TJ Maxx late last week. It was a spontaneous trip after work... I honestly don't even know what I was looking for.

And then I saw these beauties.

They're kind of tacky, but they're also kind of fabulous... right?

I'm not sure. My fashion radar is all kinds of messed up these days.

Unfortunately for me, I didn't buy them.

However, I did photograph them on the floor of TJ Maxx.

Damn.

What do you think?

Cute or fugly?

I can't form the right words right now to say what's in my heart...

But if you have a minute or an hour, please send up some prayers for Cohen's family tonight.

Life is just so unfair.

I know it's not supposed to be, and I know that God has plans for all of us beyond what we can see... but it sucks.

Completely Insane.

My brother just told me I look like an insane clown escaped from a mental hospital.

It's 8 am and that's a bowl of strawberry ice cream in my hands.

Seriously, what is wrong with me?

(I was wearing the sunglasses because I just came in from outside. Not because my future's so bright I gotta wear shades.)

Do you have any fun weekend plans?

I shall be working and working and moving my crap to the new house. Help!

The Pringle Sneak

I'm not a huge junk food eater.

Oh wait, that's a lie.

Anyways.

So recently I've had this addiction to Whole Grain Pringles. They're like regular Pringles, but more delicious.

And recently, my little brother (home from college) has become an expert on the Pringle Sneak.

Let me show you.

Step 1: Spot Awesomely-Delicious Can of Pringles
Step 2: Get excited because they are un-opened for maximum stuffing-your-face.
Step 3: See someone has been tampering with your perfect snack.
Step 4: Rage. Who's been eating my SNAACK?!?!
The can is nearly empty.
But at least there were a delicious few left.

Have any of you had your delicious snacks stolen from under your nose?! And does PMS cause you to rage about it?

Yeah, me either!

Wine and Whine. Same Difference.

This week I have the best wine picture ever. Seriously, I am awesome.

(Ok, my dad thought of the idea. I am not original to save my life. Whatever, I'm OK with it.)

The wine of the week is Red Bicyclette.
Purchased because of the cute red bike on the label, obviously.

I was going to ride down the street with the wine in the water-bottle holder but then I realized this bike is set up for somebody over 6 feet tall.

And it also cost over a thousand dollars.

Which means I should not feel at all frivolous for wanting a $600 camera that I'm going to use for years and years, RIGHT?!

And I wasn't about to crash a thousand dollar bike for the Best Wine Picture Ever... so I just decided this was for the best.

What are you drinking this week tonight?

Delicious Bourbon Chicken

Remember back in April when I promised I'd post my homemade bourbon chicken recipe later that week?

Yeah, about that.

Better late than never, right?

Right.

Here we go.

First, brown up about a pound or two of chicken chopped into smallish pieces.

In a small mixing bowl or measuring cup, mix together the following:

1 clove garlic, crushed (I use the refrigerated pre-chopped stuff.)
1/4 teaspoon ginger
3/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes (or less if you want less spicy)
1/4 cup apple juice (I've used other juices in a pinch)
1/3 cup light brown sugar (I use a lot less because I don't like too much sweetness)
2 tablespoons catsup (ketchup?)
1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar
1/2 cup water
1/3 cup reduced-sodium soy sauce
(Sometimes I add a squirt of mustard if I feel like it.)

Once the chicken is browned, dump the mixture over the chicken. Simmer on the stove for about 15-20 minutes.

I serve mine over rice.

(And it normally looks a lot browner than this... maybe I added a bunch of mustard to this batch? I don't remember.)

Either way, this is a fairly-easy and definitely tasty dinner.

And it's probably much healthier than the bourbon chicken I get at the mall.

Do you have any fun new recipes? My cooking is getting mighty boring...

Ginormous is All About Perspective

I've probably mentioned around here that I'm moving. Less than 2 weeks to go.

(Cue panic attack.)

One of the reasons I'm most excited to move is my new closet. You see, in the rental house I'm in now, there is a teeny-tiny closet. It's embarrassing. My clothes literally explode out of it.

Since I don't have to work until this afternoon, I thought I'd move some of my extra clothes over there this morning. The ones I won't want to wear in the next two weeks, slash the ones that I never wear anyways but can't bear to get rid of for no good reason.
So how is it that these non-necessary clothes take up like a whole third of my ginormous closet?!

Apparently ginormous isn't really all that ginormous.

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Speaking of moving, I hate moving. My stuff likes to sprawl out.... and containing it all in boxes and storage and blah blah blah - I hate it.

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And also speaking of moving... I am moving right along at work too. I am in the process of moving to a different location and helping settle in my replacement. I am really not looking forward to breaking the news to my staff. I think it might get a little hostile.

Ugh.

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So what I'm trying to say is... ugh! Who else needs a vacation?

And where should we go?

Lazy or Genius

In approximately 2 weeks-ish, I am moving. (With my dad, for those of you keeping track. My job is not nearly secure enough that I feel like moving out. Yet. Soon. But that's a whole long story for another day.)

So, you're moving into a house where the previous owner's idea of housecleaning was... nothing.

Literally, there are 10 years of dirt, dust, and grime on every single surface. The carpets, the countertops, the walls, the light fixtures. Every single thing is FILTHY.

(Yes, I've gone through several rolls of paper towels and I do a load of housecleaning rags every single time I'm at the house.)

And then I get to the light fixtures. And I'm all "ugh, I don't want to deal with all of these ugly cheap-ass light fixtures."

Since the house was built in the '90s, it has a lot of ugly brass light fixtures. Fixtures we are going to replace... when we have time. AKA not before we move in.

So what's a girl to do when the light fixtures need cleaned but she wants to throw them in the trash?

Step 1: remove all glass parts from fixtures.

Step 2: realize the home's dishwasher is shot, which isn't a big deal cause we're replacing it... but still.

Step 3: Load all glass light parts into a laundry basket.
(Can you SEE how dusty these things are?? BARF!)

Step 4: Load the laundry basket into the car. Take great care because one slip and all your light fixtures are dunzo.
Step 5: Pray for no traffic and crazy drivers. The last thing I need is glass shards embedded in my skull.

Step 6: Unload lights directly into dishwasher. Run.

Step 7: Sparkly shiny lights.

Wasn't that easy??

(Or would it have just been easier to hand-wash them at the new house? You be the judge.)

So am I lazy or genius?

We'll Always Have Shopping

Oops, I disappeared for a couple of days. My bad.

You see, I was all raring to post on Monday morning... and then of course Blogger was all messed up. Bad Blogger!

And then I was busy and yadda yadda yadda. You know the drill.

Anyway, I have accidentally on purpose been doing some online shopping lately. My need for comfy summer dresses is at its peak and I am not finding satisfaction locally.

And you all know I love a good dress.

On Saturday, I saw that almost all the dresses at LOFT were $40 on the website. SOLD!

So I ordered a few size/color combos for comparison's sake.

Twist Waist V-Neck Dress, Black
By the way, it twirls beautifully.
(Alternately, my right hand looks like it's reaching out to punch somebody. So if I ever get in a fistfight, I would look good winding up, I think.)

Twist Waist V-Neck Dress, Pink
Does this pink one look too big? Does it look like it's falling off my shoulders? Dang my tiny shoulders! (Also, if you look closely you can see some paint from my new house on my feet. Classy!)

Ruched Knit Dress, Fresh Navy
I normally hate spaghetti-strap dresses... but in all reality, I'm probably always going to wear a cardigan over it. Because I'm modest like that. About my arms.

Ruched Knit Dress, Tea Berry
I don't know why this is called Tea Berry colored when it is SO obviously coral. Silly LOFT people... getting all creative with their names and such.

And I almost completely forgot about this last one.

Which is bad, because I am really truly excited about being on the maxi-dress bandwagon. Seriously.

New York and Company Goddess Maxi Dress
I ordered this last week (in the color I linked to - Almost Black). And paid full price. Now it's on sale for $35. You're welcome.

I wonder if I called if they would price adjust it for me? (I do it for people at work all the time.... I just want me fair share!)

So... I probably shouldn't keep all 4 LOFT dresses, right?? Cause I really don't need four dresses in only 2 styles. But 4 colors!

Geesh, I am a piece of work these days ladies!

(And if I drop off the planet again in the next couple of days... it's because things are about to get insane at work. Hold me.)

Has anybody else been shopping till they drop lately?

No? Just me.

Ok then.

Happy Wednesday!
(Holy crap, how is it already Wednesday?!)

I Will Survive. But Just in Case I Don't, Does Anyone Want My Size 7.5 Shoe Collection??

Currently, I feel like I'm doing the work of 2 people at work. Unfortunately, these 2 jobs are spaced 30-some miles apart... which means I am constantly on the phone and running between places to try and sort things out.

I feel like a walking zombie.

Scratch that - driving zombie. Bad!

(Don't worry, I am ingesting tons of caffeine. On the other hand, my teeth are going to rot out of my head.)

And did I mention my dad got possession of a new house on Friday and we're renovating it big time before we move in a couple of weeks?

Heh, must've slipped my mind.

Nothing new there.

Send mental good vibes. And wine.

(To be ingested when I'm NOT driving, obviously.)

Help.